April 30, 2019 | David F. Coppedge

Natural Selection: Darwin’s All-Purpose Magic Wand

If it exists, it evolved. How? By natural selection. How does that work? It makes things evolve. That’s all you need to know.

Darwin’s “Stuff Happens Law” (natural selection) persists in the media. Why? It has to; Darwinists and their willing accomplices in the media and academia have outlawed every other explanation, including logic.*

*If logic evolved, it isn’t logical.

Island lizards are expert sunbathers, and researchers find it’s slowing their evolution (Science Daily). Evolution is fast, except when it is slow. Don’t sunbathe too much, or your evolution might slow down, too. And you know what they say; evolve or perish.

Is one toe really better than three? How horse’ legs evolved for travel rather than speed (Science Daily). Evolution evolved five digits, except when it evolved three or one. Horses evolved to be fast, except when they evolved to travel distances. Humans can outrun horses in endurance running, but they have evolved to have five toes, not one. So you see, evolution explains everything.

Evolution from water to land led to better parenting (Science Daily). “The evolution of aquatic creatures to start living on land made them into more attentive parents, says new research on frogs led by the Milner Centre for Evolution at the University of Bath.” Fish must be terrible parents. Whales, too, because they evolved to go back into the water. But what does “better” mean to an evolutionist? Nothing; whatever happens, it evolved.

Family quarrels in seeds reveal the ways parents and offspring sometimes evolve in conflicting directions (Phys.org). Evolution loves conflict and competition. Except when it loves cooperation. Do seeds have family quarrels? They must have. Darwin says so.

This Fish Just Gave Evolution the Finger and Got Pregnant (Live Science). Evolution invented eggs, except when it invented live birth. “Various animals, including several fish, are known to have independently developed the ability to give birth to live young,” Rafi Letzter explains without blinking. “Perhaps, this is a window into how that evolutionary leap happens.” Perhaps. Perhaps not. If evolution gets the finger, Darwin smiles and says that evolved, too.

Bird Evolution: Convergence Fits the Bill (Current Biology). Daniel J. Field explains, “disparate bill shapes evolved repeatedly throughout bird evolutionary history.” Of course they did. In “evolutionary history,” stuff happens, right? If it’s not divergent Stuff Happens, it might be convergent Stuff Happens. They’re as different as Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dumb.

Humans are still evolving, all right.

Human evolution is still happening – possibly faster than ever (The Conversation). “Yes, we’re still evolving.” Believe it. The caption under the graphic says so. Laurence D. Hurst says that evolution happens by natural selection except when it doesn’t. He’s exhibit A, evolving into an expert just-so storyteller.

The natural selection of words: Finding the features of fitness (PLoS One). Peter Tourney and Saif Mohammad should be nominated for the BAH! prize, having written the most absurd, self-refuting hypothesis in recent memory. If words evolve by “natural” selection, does this imply selfish memes rule language? If so, the humans don’t mean anything they say. Words are using them to pass on their memes. Cue sound of implosion.

These are scientists and reporters on acid. Dennett said that Darwinism is a universal acid. It eats away the brains of its disciples, turning them into storytellers in fantasyland. Lock them up before they cause any more harm.

 

 

 

 

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