January 21, 2025 | David F. Coppedge

Darwin Storytellers Desperate

Running out of material for just-so
stories, Darwinians are indulging
in junior-high-level subject matter

 

‘Contagious’ peeing may have deep evolutionary roots, chimp study suggests (Live Science, 20 Jan 2025). Observation: some chimpanzees urinate when they see kin doing so. Conclusion: “Contagious peeing may have deep evolutionary roots:” Oh please, Olivia Ferrari; have you no shame? Not shame over urination, which is a fact of creation, but shame over dragging Darwin into it. According to Olivia, the Bearded Buddha urges us to pee in groups, because there is no difference between me, thee, and the chimpanzee.

Because groups of people often go to the bathroom together too, and chimpanzees are our’ closest living relatives, this social behavior could be traced back to our common ancestor, researchers said.

“In humans, we know that our decision to urinate is influenced by social contexts that lead us to urinate simultaneously with others, and that this simultaneous urination could also promote further social bonding,” study co-author Shinya Yamamoto, a wildlife researcher at Kyoto University, told Live Science in an email. “Our study with chimpanzees clearly shows that they share some similarities in this phenomenon, suggesting the deep evolutionary origin of contagious urination.

In chimpanzees, peeing is contagious (Cell Press via Science Daily, 20 Jan 2024). This writer tops Lie Science by mentioning evolution three times. For example, “Our research suggests that this phenomenon may have deep evolutionary roots. We found that chimpanzees, our closest relatives, tend to urinate in response to the urination of nearby individuals.” You can’t help yourself. Darwin makes you do it.

Why don’t science reporters consider non-deterministic, mind-directed reasons for this? This is simply the power of suggestion. Watching someone else yawn often makes you think about it. All humans and animals must urinate periodically. For humans, maybe the sight of a bathroom or someone entering it sometimes prompts us to think about whether it’s time for the physiological necessity ourselves. Animals have eyes and senses that can act as triggers for necessary behaviors. What’s Darwin got to do with it?

We struggled to find a way to illustrate the silliness of this notion, but figured that a version of the “March of Man” icon with the creatures leaking on each other would not be appropriate for a family-friendly website. Instead, here’s a generated cartoon of the Bearded Buddha teaching journalism students the art of evolutionary groupthink.

Darwin training his class of preferred students on how to think as a Darwinist.

All together now: chimps engage in contagious peeing (Nature, 21 Jan 2025). You might think that serious science journals would distance themselves from such nonsense. Thou didst think wrongly. Even Nature fell into this silly notion. Where, O where, is a lonely reporter with some courage and integrity to call out silliness when Darwinists engage in it like this?

Socially contagious urination in chimpanzees (Current Biology, 21 Jan 2025). Here is the “research” by four Japanese Darwinists who had nothing better to do than sit around sipping Darwine, which has the property of requiring frequent urination. When one got up to go to the bathroom during the just-so story brainstorming session, the others thought of the pressure on their own bladders, and a light bulb went on— and quickly blew out. As the collective perhapsimaybecouldness index rose, they dreamed of futureware and job security for storytellers.

Research with wild populations (e.g. analyzing associations between contagious urination and ranging patterns, territory use, and party memberships) will be important in exploring potential evolutionary function.

They appeal to futureware because their science is poor. They only tested their hypothesis on captive chimpanzees, not humans. They looked at historic art of humans urinating together, without considering that through much of history the locations for it within cities were limited and this was a necessity, not a choice. They also failed to recognize gender differences. Most of us know that women prefer going to the bathroom together but men prefer privacy. Men consider the group-bathroom behavior of women strange. Did only women evolve from chimpanzees? However you look at this research, it was lacking in rigor, it was Darwin-driven, and based on a vapid premise.

Contagious urination has the potential to reveal important links between group-living and physiological contagion. Its distribution, mechanism, and possible functions can each contribute to existing debates about synchrony and contagion and open novel research questions outside of them. A deeper understanding of contagious urination may reveal diverse insights into the significant, but largely neglected, role of sociality in the decision to urinate, and equally into the role of urination in sociality, across species.

Ah, yes. Understanding. The lure of insight promised to faithful Darwinites who meditate on the Bearded Buddha leads to contagious group behavior. If these authors had thought more deeply about their premise for just a minute, they would have realized that their own lure to tell just-so stories is contagious. If all human behavior is a product of our chimpanzee past, there is nothing they can do about it [cue sound of implosion]. It was determined by some random mutation in their ancestral chimpanzee that was mysteriously “selected” by a blind watchmaker for no good reason. As such, their paper has no scientific validity. Nevertheless, this evolved behavior led to the Darwin Publishing Industry. Now you understand.

A Positive Alternative

Fertiliser can be made from human urine in just a few simple steps (New Scientist, 20 Jan 2025). Here’s a better use for research time. Given the biological fact of urine, which is rich in nitrogen, why not find ways to recycle it for the good of plants? Nothing about evolution here. Is this not a more worthwhile use of research efforts than telling readers that chimpanzee behaviors millions of Darwin years ago determined human behaviors? Plants have what we need, and we have what plants need (nitrogen and CO2). Chinese scientists thought about ways to connect these needs more efficiently.

Now go pee in the compost pile, if you can do it privately without the DODOs watching you.

Creationists have better science to propose. Everything created by God is good, and worthy of study in context. Students should learn in appropriate settings, such as a physiology class, about the intricate processes within our bodies to filter fluids in the kidneys and direct them through specialized channels to a holding tank (the bladder). When the bladder is full, two-way communication channels to the brain via the enormously complex central nervous system let us know when the time comes to evacuate the nitrogen-enriched waste fluids which we call urine. Each animal and bird has systems for this need appropriate to their body plan and environment (e.g., camels recycle most of their water within the body so that they can endure the desert). Everything about the body’s wastewater recycling system is marvelous and good, and more sophisticated than we can imagine. This true “circular economy” in which nothing is wasted inspires scientists to be good stewards of the products of our own inventions. God even provided a “disgust” response to our own wastes so that we avoid them, and hormones to make us feel good as we take care of business. Godly research into his works are a cause of thanksgiving (I Timothy 4:4).

Project: If you teach science or home school your children, propose a science project that mimics the human body’s process for waste recycling. (1) Have your precocious student invent a process that generates useless byproducts, and see if he or she can invent another process that recycles the waste as input to the generator. This challenging assignment may lead to awe about how the human body handles excess fluids and nitrogen. (2) A second project idea is to study the effect of urine on plants and fertilizer from compost. Students should learn that bodily processes are not shameful in themselves, and can be studied with proper attention to privacy and modesty. The students can collect urine samples in bottles in the bathroom and measure doses applied to plants or compost in various concentrations. (3) A third project might be to record the kinds of laughter junior high students generate when told that scientists seriously think we evolved “contagious urination” from chimpanzees. Shaming Darwinists, as this project can illustrate, is a worthwhile endeavor toward the purification of science.

 

 

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Comments

  • EberPelegJoktan says:

    Do “just-so stories” explain historical and linguistic material? Do you base something off of a mere opinion? Imagine if history and language as well as science operate and are subject to mere opinion. Is that how these fields operate?

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